Motivation

I expect that at some point someone will read what I've posted here. If that is the case I'd like to question why I started it in the first place.

1. I like to leave comments on public websites and had to sign up to blogger in order to do this.
   
2. I like to revisit this page to remember past events and emotions. I could do this with a paper diary but blogger is easier to access while I work and has an inbuilt spellcheck.
   
3. I'm beginning to enjoy the slightly mysterious nature of my own blog. Taciturn with a hint of self-pity. A photo that leaves much to the imagination. But even this mystery is a vanity that I'm not entirely comfortable with.

One counter argument (especially to point 2) is that keeping a public diary is just like putting on a mask. Whoever sees your blog only sees what you wish to present. I've seen lots of examples of very bad blogs which are no more than a public display. But I've seen a few that impress me with their honesty. If I am to blog, I should try to share the courage and honesty of good writers, even if I can't be quite as witty, technically efficient or biographically interesting.

And I don't think a blog needs to be much more than an occasional comment, observation or report. I don't like the idea of saying much about myself in public but its only fair that anyone I 'speak' to on the Internet should be able to learn a little more about me and be able to respond. So If I continue to appear taciturn, you'll know why.

And then it happened...

Of course it was not entirely unexpected, after all Dad was 85. It just seems odd that my last post here was so relevant to what we have found ourselves dealing with for the past three weeks.

I didn't want him to go.